I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
