I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
