I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
you made out with another girl for some wings
Randomize
