Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
