Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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