The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
So here I am, sexting at work.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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