White coat. Heels.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
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