you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Randomize
