I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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