I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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