I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
we made out on top of his cat.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
