check it out our google latitudes are spooning
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Randomize
