You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Randomize
