does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Randomize
