I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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