please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
