everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
