I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I need a burrito and a hug.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Randomize
