i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize