I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Dick very happy bro
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
