For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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