my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
