I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
