Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
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