I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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