Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
