I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I smell like Dick and happiness
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
