New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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