My brain says no but my pants say off.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
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