drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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