another moral hangover. fuck.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
