In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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