it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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