kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
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