he wants to bone in the snuggie
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
