watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
