At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize