I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
