we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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