No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
