if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
PANTIES FOUND
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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