Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
