never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
How does it feel to date your dad?
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
