That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
