I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Randomize
