Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Randomize
