How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
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