Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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