We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
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