Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
