it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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