He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize